Self-routine

I am tempted to dwelve in the past
Start at a point on the shore
saunter along and just when
I 'd thought I was enjoying the wind
I get drawn into an embankment

Going over pebbles and rocks here
I scan top-down and bottom-up
arrange events as I recollect
not sure what I am looking for
may be an overlooked detail

Alas! my thoughts, they have a cradle for time being
This reason beginning to empower me
Now I happen to see everything through its eyes
A knack or a mistake
from the start till the end

It engulfs me slowly
Also, it is put up against present demons
And as this particular belief heralds past mortem
it becomes stronger with every test
regardless of the outcome



I live in this house
Walls have sand and pebbles from the shore
the time is working at it, kilns a brick-rationale
and carves one room after another
And I seem to be stuck in one at present

I wish I could move more freely
Rather! I wish for a library
rooms would be books at my disposal
stacked in perpetual shelves
marked, though, only with labels of 'love' and 'hate'.

- kovid

मैं

मैं

फिरता रहूँ बादलों की तरह बेफ़िक्र
ऐसी  फ़ितरत हो ये आरज़ू है
बैरागन जुड़ा रहूँ ज़मीन से फिर भी
ऐसी सोहबत मिले ये जुस्तजू है

घडी का काँटा आगे बढ़  रहा हैं
अस्तित्व की शायद यहीं पराकाष्ठा है
मैं बदलता साज़ हूँ सचेत
गर हूँ माध्यम या रचनाकार

- कोविद

tu hai to acha hai - rail yatra

baitha tha mei compartment k andar

Ek ajnabee-pan sa tha

tu aayi aur na jaane kaunsa 

rang bikhra..

sab apne se lagne lage

Ye teri rooh ki khubsoorti hai 

tujhse mulakat hui aur ek naya

khumaar sa hai

tu hai to acha hai

Idea of you seems better (5th Dec 2012)

Lay down alone dreaming onto you
Hopes and fears of a becoming driving me crazy
Worsened altogether by your indifference
Don't tell me now
The idea of you seemed better

Waking up to a shaking reality
Still hopeful of sighting a shooting star
Passing hours make me miserabled
Don't tell me now
The idea of you seemed better

Sorrow

Never would like to speak
For what we have been left into

Expecting the sorrow to be dormant
And yet its yearning relentless threads within

Even when nothing seemed
Be for the best of the future

Still the thought of the sorrow
I believe is worth something.

Leave the agony of not putting it into words..

Felt like the paradise of eternity

Never felt like this ever.

Had to clinch myself up to accept the reality
Hard to say that all in a moment of deprivation.

You never gave It a chance

said its never gonna work

said its preposterous

And I tried and I tried..

And I tried hard enough..

Till I lost my way coz of the coldness that

Rose through your responses.

Response so cold it felt like staring into a cold night

Like troubled mountains atop a lake of serenity

Like some soul less fish in a lifeless pond

Your words kept me lurking in the darkness

And kept me awake while I was so lost in the dreams of my own solitude.

Quit 'em already!

Day 3!

I have tried quitting them earlier but never succeded...this time there seems a resolve and undeterring clarity within, which seems enough to sail through:p..yeah i am talkin about cigarettes and 'them' coz they do have an individuality in a smokers mind and surely they do stalk the smoker in multiples.

So when everythin seems to go rite..wht would a vella person do..hmm..i think he would ponder about why the hell is this happening to me, or I was supposed to be a smoker , I had given up my resistance against 'them'..but still thinking from a personal intelligent perspective(:p) it feels good that this unnecessary bond is finally let go and trust me they dont allure tht much! trust me..they dont!

Its all may be because of oral probation and if you have the remedies for tht like gum or may be elaichi, supari(something to chew basically to scare away the blues..u knw wht i mean) one can surely acheive 3 days of non smokingness..nd counting(:P)..just take it day by day..instant by instant..nothin more to think of..nothin to ponder upon..and if still wondering then write a blog entry!